Purification

Been trying to find this thing to move on, to clean myself. I have been running away and searching for this eternal Eden, but then I haven't realize that I am not really looking for this eternal paradise, well I have but what's is the point of being there when there is no one alongside you to spend your life with in this ethereal place. I have been searching for the wrong medicine, I have been craving for the wrong chocolate or I have been taking the wrong drug and perhaps I have lost track of what I am here for. I came here to Australia in a search for something but I wasn't sure from the beginning what was it that I was searching for. I am a runner but what am I running away from? From the comfort of a warm place where everything is familiar or from the fact that I wasn't never able to find this person whom I can really relate to or be comfortable with. I have found this person but then somehow I managed to sabotage the whole thing because that's me, I was too complacent with it or maybe as a human being I need to find and excuse to keep running and keep searching.