Anxiety

Something is bothering me, something is keeping me awake all night long and is not that I can't find sleep easily but it is something that I cannot solve and it is bothering me so much but I can't do anything else. The problem is what am I going to do, I am in South America and I don't seem to be doing anything productive. I mean I can't be doing this all my life, running away all the time. I have reasons to stay as well as reasons not to stay. I just don't know what to do. I mean, I am not spending much money here but my motto is to use but not to abuse and it is kind of bothering me because I am staying at my friends and families house here at both Brasil and Paraguay and I am not really doing anything for the household so it is bothering me because I am not used to get that kind of freebies, I don't know why but I am not used to that kind of generosity. I don't wanna abuse my friends and relatives' nice gesture by keeping me in their house for free and eating for free but then I don't have a lot of money to spend so it is hard, even thou they have asked me to stay a bit longer for my moms birthday so that is kind of keeping me here. I want to stay because I think I have someone here to keep me happy but then I don't have a job and I am not keen in working in Brasil so going back to Australia seems to be the right thing to do but, then what I am going to do in Australia? I have someone to keep me warm at night, well for the time being, without thinking too much about it and a family to share some moments but they leave miles away, like 12 hours bus drive so I can only have one things at a time. I know I am greedy. There are some friends but they will be leaving soon but the adventures still there and my second year in Australia will be my last one so this is killing me so I dont know what to do. I wish I have someone to tell me what to do but I don't usually like people telling me what to do. I need to do the right thing and I need to wait until Monday so I can speak to the airline and sort it out. It is going to be a long weekend for me. Not a long and peaceful one I guess.